For issues such as sleep i.e., co-sleeping Cs. sleep training, look at parenting books and articles Marriage together that support the different sides. Then discuss what's best to do. This goes both ways: Yes, you should continue your three book clubs if that makes you happy, but then you should also indulge your husband when he wants to train for the marathon. Sudden increases in problem intensity and poor conflict management, and decreases in relationship confidence, were seen in mothers after birth; a sudden decrease in relationship dedication was seen in fathers. This could be about the summer home you want to buy out east that you will likely never be able to afford or that trip to Italy you want to take someday, or, um, being empty esters. It's nice to think you'd share childrearing philosophies, but it's often hard to predict how you'll feel about sleep, food, and discipline until your smack in the middle of your fourth night up with baby. If your parents feel like your making time for them, they'll be less pushy. Why would I give you that kind of advice? Here was the person I loved, with whom I had just pulled off the miracle of creating a life and...I wanted to kill him. Your parents now, but you're still you, too...which brings us back to where we started.